Tag Archive: bravo


Grip on that Self Esteem

What is self esteem? Self Esteem reflects a person’s overall evaluation of appraisal of his or her own worth.

This article was birthed out of a discussion I had with someone. They approached me with a question that I did not see coming. The person asked: “Am I attractive?” This question was never asked to seal the individual’s convictions of his/her level of attractiveness. Instead it was asked because I think this individual was insecure about it.

What was intriguing about this situation was that the individual who asked the question personally, I thought they were crazy. Because they are attractive, not even average – above it. The person has attractive skin tone, quality hair, great features, and a wonderful personality to go with all of that. If you are looking someone to settle down with they would be on your list because they lead a balanced life and is incredibly smart. One can imagine my shock. After the conversation ended I thought deeply that there is a bigger issue here. Many times we hear of young girls and boys being insecure, more so girls. Many times as well the media, internet, advertising and magazines are blamed for glamorizing images that are not Main Street.

People who find that they are insecure about anything; it typically becomes a major issue hindering emotional growth among other things.

Improving your self worth is no easy feat especially when you have reached certain levels. However, I believe with certain steps, tips, guidelines whatever a therapist may call it, they can be helped.

  1. Find things to love about yourself

This is critical because if we do not find something to love and adore within ourselves someone will point out one and it may not be all that good. As young people we are embedded in the latest gadgets, technology, and media that we forget the human side of our lives. We need to take time out from all those phones, televisions and internet to have personal time for ourselves. We may not see the importance but can we start looking in the mirror and loving what we see. Be in awe. The fact is, the celebrities who we think have a perfect life and who we look up to also find themselves being insecure about many things.

  1. Surround yourself with positive thinking people.

I think this one is mostly underestimated because we think sometimes we can combat negative people. Newsflash, most times we can’t! If you surround yourself with people who watch their calories to the tee, always pointing out other people’s faults, always degrading others, finding imperfections on their body etc. you might want to change your circle of friends. Surround yourself with people who appreciate and celebrate their lives, people who in a moment will encourage you than fight or tear you down.

  1. Challenge yourself

This will be a task. If you are like me, then you do not have a huge following of friends. J Nothing wrong with that, just treasure the ones you have today. I would tell you to challenge yourself. Test your abilities to find and appreciate things that you will begin to love about yourself. For example: if you hate your weight, get out there and do something about it. Do not try quick fixes; buying tighter fitting clothing to make you look smaller or liposuction. That will not work. Sign up for a gym or work out at home. Yes! Bring the gym home. You do not need a personal trainer. Be cost effective and find videos on Youtube that will challenge you to fight your weight.

  1. Celebrate you!

To overcome your insecurities you must begin to celebrate what have kept you down. I am sure you have seen those public service advertisements on television that have expressed people living under $1 a day, or something to that effect. We have homes to live in, access to the internet, clean air to breathe, food to eat and all these things. To be burdened down with our insecurities are not worth our time. Get out there and celebrate your uniqueness and change what you can change naturally. We have one life to live and living it sad, insecure and bewildered is not an option.

Love your life today and live your best life now! Go!

Since the development of the internet it would appear that reality television came after. Reality television features unprofessional actors, most times celebrities or created ones to show unscripted reactions in various scenarios. In recent times we have been seeing many newly wed couples deciding to film a reality series to be picked up by the major networks. However, it would appear that the usage of reality television for any couple in Hollywood is a divorce sentence for their marriage. Of course we can list all the victims of reality television these days. The question is, did reality television cost them their marriage or was it for different reasons. Most times children are the biggest cash cows for these series as they are also paid for the gig.

Giuliana & Bill

Giuliana & Bill

I am a huge fan of reality television. I would say I like the productions, not a fan of all the drama but I appreciate the wonderful and creative ideas that they are based off. Two reality television series that I have been following and I will be referring to in this piece are The Real Housewives of Atlanta (not really a fan) and Giuliana and Bill (can be seen on the Style Network). The Real Housewives of Atlanta is filled with drama as the show follows five Atlanta housewives on their lives and friendships with each other. The celebs on the show are always in conflicts and they lead unstable lives financially and emotionally. On the other hand, Giuliana and Bill; this reality show features both Bill Rancic – winner of the first Apprentice and Giuliana from the E Network. The show is about this couple as they lead successful careers and attempts to balance their marriage.

There are hundreds of reality shows on television, some are sane and the others are insane. One would think the sane ones would get stellar reviews and constantly being booked for another season. Hell NO! The insane reality shows, filled with wanna be celebrities, people that live unstable lives, people who you would warn your kids to stay far from are playing huge roles in what network executives are constantly booking for another season. They do this because this is the garbage that society wants. I do not know but I would never sit for hours on end and enjoy a show that shows humans behaving despicably, acting in selfish ways to their neighbours. It alarms me to know that we have reached a stage where this is what we demand daily. I would agree that this is entertaining but networks that run these series for endless hours the show becomes insipid.

The show Real Housewives of Atlanta is depressing and we wonder why we still have certain issues in our society today. When a show can glamorise black people to be irrational thinkers, uneducated, gold diggers and unproductive to society we have a huge problem on our hands. We then wonder why people are hateful of black people; they are because they have not seen anything positive of the black race. They have not seen hardworking, educated people rising to the top (apart from Obama and a few others) and the images we should be portraying of our race are absent. So they have associated with being black all the negative ideas we can think of.

The sane reality shows and images we should be desperate for are all being chopped by business executives because they have a business to run. They cannot fund sane reality shows because it is the unpopular decision to do. After all a business is not charity organization. As a people we should start demanding productive programming. I will agree that there will always be a market for insane material but we should have options. I enjoyed watching Giuliana and Bill because it never had any crazy drama scene where they were fighting each other down and the constant bickering was absent. Whatever your tastes are you can find it. If you want to see adventure, a loving couple, hardworking people who are balancing their lives check it out. I am sure you can find other sane reality television shows to watch where it can be worth your entertaining and leisure time.

The world is now an open space. With cable television comes with advantages and sore disadvantages for any society. Cultures will begin to change and people will act differently because of the diverse influences that will now be present. The cultural values that some societies were proud of will soon go away because there are other new sometimes bad values to adapt. The images and values that these insane shows project into our societies must be challenged by positive role models (which we so lack) and shows that depict what living a stable life looks like; that is reality. There is no way we can continue to accept the negative images of our race and remain silent with it. As young people we need to separate positive entertainment from negative entertainment and break the rising trend of insane reality television.