Tag Archive: marriage


Welcome to the eighth edition in the series of the Water Cooler – appears every Sunday on this blog. This feature will highlight what’s hot, topical and up for discussion.

Here we go.

Politics

What motivates you to vote for a political candidate?

Is his/her marriage really important to you?

Is marriage a prerequisite to serve at the highest level?

NO, if you ask me.

John Edwards and his familyHowever, it appears that politicians have to be married to even start a campaign. While divorces are on an all time high, it would seem we have forced politicians in a life that they don’t personally desire and that makes everything a lie.

Most times in political commentaries we focus on family life; to say political marriages makes the candidate more normal and thus has the capacity to vote on legislations that matters to you as a citizen. Married politicians are projected to be more caring and family oriented in campaigns. Although that may be true; when it isn’t going well our ‘expectations’ force them to live a lie to remain where we have forced them to be. Being married doesn’t say you have higher moral standing than those who aren’t.  What is says is that you have decided to walk life’s journey with this special person.

What say you?

Business

ModelIn a bid to stimulate the economy, the Jamaica Observer organized Fashion Night Out where fashion/retail outlets slashed their prices by large percentages up to 70% to generate high sales. Weeks ago, I had a haircut in the capital city, Kingston and at around 6pm after leaving the barber salon it was like a ghost town outside. I wondered to myself why the city was so quiet. I blamed the current economy and the recession. I should have considered that we have cultured our habits this way and this was the result. More recently, I had an acquaintance who moved to Jamaica from New York (the city that never sleeps) and after a week here he returned because the city was dead by sunset. It struck me then that we have a major problem. I appreciate the efforts what Fashion Night Out promoted and anticipate more FNOs. Over in Barbados, our neighbouring Caribbean island they have introduced legislation to have retailers open 24-7. Talk about competition and new ways of doing things. Retailers claimed the night a success which can only be good at the end of the ‘night.’

Entertainment

This is it – Review

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Michael Jackson

I watched the Michael Jackson documentary and thought it was stunning. The producers of the 50 minute documentary were able to capture the king of pop in his rehearsals before he passed away. I was impressed with the footage because it told the story we heard of Michael Jackson. Now we were able to relive the intimate moments of him without the screaming fans and blaring lights. We saw the perfectionist in action, directing the minute details of his to be last tour. There is a message within the documentary for every aspiring entertainer which must not be missed. Giving your best each time is of paramount importance and ensuring your delivery – the passion will be remembered by those who see it. That is what made MJ, what he was and so many artistes today. I sat and only imagined This is it with all the lights, screaming fans and Michael Jackson delivering his final set of shows stamping This is it into history; he never got the time.

Quote

2072865350015798315S500x500Q85“Readiness is all.” – William Shakespear

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Ahhh, You’re such a FLIRT!

Harry:                   Hey

Veronica:            What’s up?

Harry:                   I’m good.

Veronica:            Cool. I’m fantastic. You look amazing today; wish I could spend some time with you. (Smile)

Harry:                   Really

Coworkers-FlirtingFlirting for some is the ideal. Being on the receiving end gives the receiver the kick they need just to jump start their slow or bad day. If you are involved in a relationship flirting would be the last thing on your mind – based on set cultural rules. On the other hand, however, single people who are not obligated to anyone, find it enticing to flirt. But are there advantages and disadvantages of flirting? Sure, there are, but if flirting is ‘contained’ and by that I mean not over the top then friends and people in your circle should be able to flirt. Why not?

I remember later on in my high school years that we all would flirt but we knew at the end of the day nothing would come of it. It wasn’t serious – I want to date you flirt. We need to acknowledge the fact that there can be heavy or light flirt. Heavy flirt is where you make the other person uncomfortable in their space. This is most relevant in the workplace and may lead to sexual harassment. Heavy flirt also includes staring and lusting at someone in a demanding way which makes the other person think you are dangerous and makes them scared. I have been out recently and people literally act out of line in their quest to send their signal that they are interested. One would think that if someone is interested they would say “Hi”, or wave with a smile – something that is cool and fun. What people are doing is the extreme and makes you want to run. Staring and licking their lips makes it heavy flirt which makes you feel grossed out.

People who have mastered the art of flirting are great at making friends. You place them in a room with strangers and you watch them come alive as they work the room – getting people comfortable around them. I am a believer in flirting. Flirting builds ones ego, confidence and can you imagine flirting could also activate your adrenaline and nervous system? Essentially, flirting allows you to become more alert and stimulates the limbic centre of the brain, which creates pleasurable feelings among other things.

For many, flirting is an abomination and a sin in relationships. Are partners depriving themselves of lower stress levels and the ability to eliminate loneliness when they all ignore flirting – all the benefits? There should be boundaries in relationships and these must be reinforced and established. Partners in relationships should be allowed to flirt lightly. Hold on, but they do flirt without the view expressed which means that partners in relationships know the accepted limits in flirting. Relationships that embrace light flirting would mean that partners lead happy lives based on the fact that flirting provides benefits that will inextricably build better relationships.

I am in no way defending that men and women should go out of their way to flirt with others because of the guaranteed benefits. Everything should be done in moderation. Sometimes people will misinterpret your actions and think because you said something nice, sweet and endearing that it is their place to ask you out and to make certain advances. With this said one has to be extremely careful when they decide to flirt especially when in a relationship because when the word gets back to the other partner, the storyline is filled with lies.

Single folks can never really go wrong with flirting since they answer to no one. However, people who are hitched and are in relationships should be wary on how they go about flirting lightly and getting those needed benefits. Ready to flirt, who is first?

Water Cooler Ed. 3

Welcome to the third edition in the series of the Water Cooler. This feature will highlight what’s hot, topical and up for discussion. Here we go.

Politics

Last week politics in the USA was great for a news story. I mean Jimmy Carter – the gift that keeps on giving, the Rep. Joe Wilson story got a run and Obama not granting FOX NEWS an interview. Oops how could we ignore ACORN?

Jimmy Carter

Carter’s presidency is no way to be admired. He ended his political career with one of the lowest approval rates in jimmy_carter_believe_barack_obama_shistory and has not been admired by many even after leaving office. His statement on Obama may have some truth to it but is not entirely what Obama wants to be hearing at this moment. If you recall, Obama did a speech on racism earlier in his presidency – which he got high points for doing, well executed. After months of that speech, Obama wants to think that his race is behind him. The fact is racism will always be present. We cannot ignore the colour of ones skin although we would want to think that we are going to start judging people by their heart and not their skin. Even Obama is wary to agree with Carter on this issue. The fact is Obama is pursuing political ideologies that are unpopular with republicans. They have deemed it fit to express themselves with tea parties etc. However, when you have a wide scale opposition march on Obama it makes people riled up and we have seen the various racial images that are present at these rallies.

The media is so driven by sensationalism that these images allow us to discuss and major in the minority ignoring the elephant in the room. The major issue that republicans and others are having is that the president wants government to take over health care. No matter what Obama does, he will have opposition. It is nonsensical to think that those who will not side with Obama are racist and have racial thoughts. Sorry Jimmy Carter we would rather agree with you on another issue, not this one.

ACORN

So if you lived on Mars for last week you would have missed the ACORN story driven by the most trusted name in news CNN. Oops if you were tuned in to CNN you would most likely have missed the story of the week but thanks to fair and balanced FOX NEWS they drove the story home when the other networks didn’t see it fit to cover it. This story is huge because of many reasons and most democrats are not seeing the significance of it. ACORN is a group that is supported by the government – taxpayers monies and provide homes for the less fortunate. A pretending thug and a prostitute went into the offices of ACORN across the USA to peddle a child prostitution ring and instead of being challenged by the ACORN employees; they opted to give these undercover journalists tips on how to carry out their illegal activities. If this isn’t news tell me what is. I try to be objective and when I see a wrong I call it by its name. News networks who claim they are charged to deliver what is important to people must refocus their organizations. Hint – CNN.

Obama TV

Obama’s presidency is currently lukewarm. He is bent on being popular but will pay the price for appearing so many times on television. The position of being President is by no means an easy task especially when you want to pass health obama_tvcare reform. Today, September 20, 2009 Obama is appearing on 5 networks to push his health care reform except the top rated network FOX NEWS. The FOX network isn’t taking the snub likely and went after Obama calling his administration “cry baby” and “petty.”

Obama certainly had a choice of where he wanted to place his message but opting to cut FOX and including an unrated network was brave. Obama at this moment needs to be convincing the same people he is snubbing, those who follow FOX News. A recent poll showed that FOX has a more balanced viewership than CNN etc. Obama snubbing FOX is huge; it might be interpreted to be snubbing the American people.

I think Obama needs to relax a bit. He is so focused on being the face of the administration which he is but it will begin to affect him. He needs to send Gibbs and VP Biden etc to do talk shows. When he sells himself so cheaply people will not care to tune in when he needs them most.

Love & Relationship

Couples today have to juggle work and creating a balance at home in their relationships. The Water Cooler this week is suggesting an idea that will have both partners engaging in effective communication while rekindling that love at home. Most working couples find it hard after a long day at work to arrive at home to cook dinner and do all the home chores that one needs to do.

couple-cooking-kitchenIt is true, couples need to spend quality time with each other. One way they can achieve this is by cooking together. This is simple, easy and shares the stress of fixing the evening’s meal. Sharing the duties in the kitchen will enable both partners to become aware of what happened in their individual days and allow them to share experiences. You will be so surprised how far this discussion will take you. It will also get you to know things about your partner that will allow your bonding and relationship to grow.

Inspiration of the week

The weekend is already over and wow aren’t we ready for the week? Do you ever have a perfect day? Well most of us don’t. Something are always off and sometimes things go pretty well. For this week try your best to keep a positive thought. Activities and duties may not be perfect, a supervisor may get on your nerves and you may be pressed to 2072865350015798315S500x500Q85meet that deadline. Think about the positive in the situation – you are blessed with life, a job and a home – not to mention lunch.  The moment you break away from your momentum other things will get off. You may begin to give a little attitude to your co-workers which may never be a good thing. I am not saying you will never face reality and notice the file isn’t opening or the report you thought you had finished is incomplete but hey, think of a solution and move on. Are you going to be stuck on the file not opening or beat yourself up for not finishing the report?

To view others in the series:

Water Cooler Ed. 2

Water Cooler

Single Ladies Generation

Beyonce

Beyonce

Pull me into your arms
Say I’m the one you WANT
if you don’t, you’ll be alone
and like a ghost I’ll be gone

Lyrics from Beyonce’s Single Ladies

For some time now I have not taken Beyonce’s Single Ladies song seriously. I have listened to the song many times but thought it was a fun, great song to dance to (not me lol), never thinking about the hard issues embedded in it until I had a heart to heart conversation with a friend.

For many who have tried dating and searching for love, they’ll admit how sad it gets when the man you expect to pop the question never does, but gets so scared.

I do not support people who spend years dating and flirting with a steady boyfriend/girlfriend and never asks the question to be married or even become exclusive partners. It is ridiculous and makes the guy (most times we are expected to have that discussion) look silly and his actions questionable. Is he there for the long haul? Is he nervous about commitments? Whatever the answer, guys who flirt around for years, afraid to enter marriage, will most often lose the girl.

Personally, I think men who are wary to enter commitments show characteristics that women should refrain from entertaining in their lives. If both parties give selflessly to the relationship and the man doesn’t ask the question, should the female let him go? Should women be expected to start popping the marriage/commitment question then? Certainly women will not consider the suggestion that they should start going on one knee. I would say the  majority of us (both male and female) would agree that the decision should be left to the man to make.

Now, more than ever, women are not waiting on men to propose. In the twinkling of an eye, another gentleman or lady is ready to pick up where you left off. This brings me to the line Beyonce shouts in her song, “Where my ring at?”

Many women are asking, “where is my ring?”. Come on: a good partner doesn’t come along twice. When you have found the one that completes you, challenges you and makes love the best, “put a ring on it.”

If you don’t, you’ll be alone, and like a ghost they’ll be gone. – Beyonce’s Single Ladies